


Paradise Misplaced

by gloria_scott



Category: Magnum P.I. (TV)
Genre: Gen, Shippy Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-20 10:01:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3646107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gloria_scott/pseuds/gloria_scott
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The day before Magnum is scheduled to testify in a high-profile case, Higgins goes missing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Paradise Misplaced

**Author's Note:**

  * For [galerian_ash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/galerian_ash/gifts).



> Many thanks to lady_ganesh for the beta!

It's hard to believe, I know, but even Paradise has its dark side. I'm not just talking about my all too frequent brushes with the criminal element that comes with being a private investigator. The islands themselves can kill you. All those things that attract the tourists like bees to nectar can turn deadly under the right conditions. Beneath those beautiful blue waves lie rip tides and tiger sharks. That breeze gently rustling the palm leaves on a lazy morning can turn into a typhoon and level a village. And the sun, well it can help you work on a killer tan or it can turn your skull into an oven and roast your brains.

Especially if you have the misfortune of finding yourself stuffed into a hotbox on a secluded beach with a possible concussion.

One of Miyasaki's goons had got the jump on me and busted me in the head when my back was turned. That much I knew, but it took a few minutes once I regained consciousness for me to remember the events leading up to that point. I had been set to testify today against Ishiro Miyasaki, an import/export mogul who was up on some pretty serious human trafficking charges. The trial wasn't going well; one key witness had changed her story on the stand, and another had never shown up and remained missing. In an overabundance of caution, spurred on by Miyasaki's reputation for making his problems disappear, Carol had ordered protective custody for me to make sure I made it to the courtroom in one piece.

What neither of us had counted on was Miyasaki's skillful and ruthless use of leverage. Higgins never made it back from visiting Agatha yesterday morning. It was well after midnight when I was finally able to slip out of the safe house and away from my babysitters in blue togo looking for him. On a hunch I went out to Kaneoha Bay, where Miyasaki had been known to put up a mistress or two. It was remote and secluded, the perfect place for hiding secrets. Fortunately, I was right. Not so fortunately, Miyasaki's muscle was waiting for me.

Who knows how long I was out, but when I opened my eyes I couldn't even tell the difference at first because everything was dark. I could hear the waves breaking on the beach not far away. The air around me was thick and stifling, and my head throbbed painfully with every heartbeat. I sat hunched over on the ground, knees to chest, hands behind my back. When I tried to straighten up two things became clear: one, my hands were tied, and two, I was in a really tight space. My head brushed against the ceiling and my feet were pressed against the wall.

At a guess, I'd been tossed into a box and left to roast on a remote private beach, far from any help. That was Miyasaki's style, all right. He'd let the island do the dirty work for him.

I felt something soft against my back – not the wall of the box. I could just hear the faint sound of labored breathing. Even in the windowless dark and the cloudy haze of a busted head I had no doubt who my silent companion was.

“Higgins?”

No answer.

“Higgins?”

I jostled him a little bit but still there was no response.

“Sergeant Major!”

“I take full responsibility, Brigadier,” Higgins muttered. “I should have never let the lads go on ahead without me.”

“That's great, Higgins, but I need you to come back to this decade now, please.”

“Magnum?” he said, voice thick with confusion. “What are you doing here?”

“I was just in the neighborhood and thought I'd drop by.”

“How did they find you?” he asked.

“Oh, you know. I sort of walked right into their secret hideout.”

“Good heavens! Why on earth would you do that?”

“To find you, of course!”

“Magnum, I expressly refused to tell them where you were in order to prevent that from happening.”

“Yeah, well, you're welcome.”

The silence that settled in after that started to worry me. It was unnatural, and very un-Higgins-like. The hot air wrapped around me like a woolen blanket that had been soaked in boiling water, and sweat kept dripping into my eyes. I was already painfully thirsty and I couldn't have been in there for very long. Higgins had already survived twenty-four hours in this box. He couldn't take much more. I had to do something to keep him awake and fighting. 

“I have a confession to make. Higgins, are you listening to me? This is important. I took the bottle of Château Pétrus you were going to serve at the Hanaloa Orchid Society dinner.”

Normally he'd have read me the riot act for making him serve an inferior Bordeaux to guests of Robin Masters, but all my confession got out of him this time was a wordless groan.

“Did you hear me? I said I took the very expensive wine that you were going to serve and I used it to wash down – are you ready? – two Macho Tacos and an order of Macho Nachos. With extra jalapenos. Not only that, I let you blame it on an inventory mistake when actually,” I forced a laugh, “it was all my fault.”

No response at all. Okay, time for the big guns.

“Higgins? That wasn't really what I wanted to tell you. What I really wanted to tell you is, I slept with Agatha.”

“You... what?” Higgins managed a hoarse whisper. Which was good. I mean, what I had said was a lie, of course. A really big, and not particularly good, lie. But it was the best my scrambled brain could come up with under the circumstances. Now if I could just keep him talking.

“I slept with Agatha. I didn't mean to, it just sort of... happened.”

“What? When?” He sounded dull and confused, like I had just woken him up from a fevered sleep.

“That night I took her to see the symphony while you went dancing with your therapist.”

There was a long pause during which all I could hear was the beat of my own pulse in my ears. I was about to say something, anything, to break the oppressive silence when what I had been waiting for finally happened.

“Oh. My. _God_!”

Ha! Got him.

“Magnum! How could you?” His words were sharp and clear; no sign of exhaustion or confusion now.

I tried my best to keep the grin out of my voice and sound suitably repentant. “I know, Higgins. I'm sorry.”

“How could you take advantage of her like that?”

“Me take advantage? Oh no, you've got it all wrong. She was the instigator. She was all over me; I could barely keep up.”

“And now you resort to casting aspersions on the character of one of the finest, most upstanding women I have ever known. Blaming your base urges on her! Honestly Magnum, you have done what I will charitably call 'morally questionable' things in your time, but this... this really is beyond the pale.”

There was the old Higgins again, full of fight and righteous indignation.

“Are you mad?”

“Am I... damn right I'm angry! When we get out of here and back to the estate I want you to pack your things and leave the guest house immediately. To say that you have overstayed your welcome would be like saying Napoleon should have left Russia after the battle of Smolensk!”

“Okay Higgins, whatever you say. And we are going to get out of here you know.”

“How?” Higgins demanded.

“I don't know. We'll figure something out.”

I guess by “figure something out” I meant “bust a way out with brute force.” I started kicking at the wall in front of me with everything I had, but my legs were drawn up too close and I couldn't get any leverage.

“Damn it! Just! Move! Already!” I punctuated every word with another futile kick until my shins ached.

“It's no use, Magnum,” Higgins said, his voice drained of all the vitality and anger it had held just minutes ago. “Save your strength.”

“Save it for what? If we don't get out of here we'll be dead by nightfall.”

“Nonsense. I once spent six months in an internment camp in Bhutan. This... this is... a veritable walk in the park compared... compared to...”

“Higgins? Higgins! No! You stay right here. Don't you leave me!”

I struggled frantically against the ropes binding my wrists, feeling Higgins, slumped over and lifeless, jerking with my every movement.

“Higgins!”

Footsteps and voices. A bright light blinded me as the hinged top of the hotbox was thrown open.

“Thomas! You okay?”

“TC? Is that you?”

“Yeah. Let's get you out of there.”

“Higgins. Get Higgins first.”

“I got Higgins,” I heard Rick's voice say. “Go on and get out of here.”

TC pulled me up and I stumbled out of the box and onto the sandy ground. He cut away the ropes and then got me on my feet again. I leaned heavily on him all the way to the Island Hoppers van and got in the back. Rick was close behind, half carrying and half dragging Higgins.

Once Higgins was settled in next to me, Rick grabbed a sport bottle from a backpack and squirted some water in his mouth. Higgins spluttered a little and started to come to.

“He's coming around. TC, let's go.” Rick slid the back door shut and hopped in the front seat.

“How did you know where to find us?” I asked.

“Let's just say I owe Icepick a favor,” Rick said. “Which means you owe me an even bigger favor. Or ten.”

I thought it best not to respond to that, figuring it would blow over eventually and the less said now the better. Maybe Rick would forget all about it in a week or two. Or maybe I was just suffering a delusional hope due to extreme dehydration and head trauma. I turned to find Higgins gazing wearily at me from heavy-lidded eyes.

“Look, Higgins, about what I said back there...”

He held up a hand and weakly waved me off. “No need.”

“No, Higgins, listen. I want you to know I didn't mean...”

“Yes, I know.”

“But Higgins, I didn't actually...”

“Magnum!” he said, marshaling his energy and straightening up as well as he could. “I know what you were trying to do. And,” he paused to breathe a deep and long-suffering sigh, “as misguided, gauche, and ham-handed as it was, I do appreciate it.”

I shrugged. “Don't mention it.”

“Indeed. I was trying not to.” He leaned back again and closed his eyes.

Under the circumstances, I was willing to forgive him his peevishness. We jostled along a dirt track leading out to the main road, TC trading gentleness for speed to get us both to a hospital as soon as possible. With each bump Higgins slumped closer to me, until his arm was pressed against mine and his head rested on my shoulder. When we finally made it onto pavement and a smoother ride, he left it there.

And I didn't mention it.

Funny thing about Paradise: it can never really be lost, even though today we'd come as close as we'd ever had. Sometimes it just gets misplaced but, fortunately, never for very long.

*****


End file.
